Yesterday afternoon was busy for me. I had to go to the bank, and stop at Chapters to pick up a crochet pattern book, then go to a Wal-Mart and a Zellers to get the yarn I needed for a pattern. All of these stores are pretty close together, and on a good day the entire trip should have taken me 45 minutes to an hour.
But...
As I was gathering my things to leave work, I fell. With my desk on my left side, I fell to my right a bit, dislocating my right knee, and crashing painfully into my chair. The chair caused me to twist some, and I dislocated my right shoulder and hip on impact. My left hip is still not healing, or feeling any better from weeks ago, when I must have done something to it, so I've been limping, favoring my left hip for a very long time.
I had to use my cane. This is usually not a big problem, as my right shoulder is still kinda good, and can take the added stress of cane use most days. But my left shoulder will never be able to take the added strain, so even after dislocating my right shoulder, I still needed to use it for my cane. And even after dislocating my right hip and knee, I had to use the cane for my left hip, so I at least wouldn't be limping onto my right leg (If I'd used it for my right leg, I'd have gotten about 5 steps before I turned into a puddle of jello). The little bit of lessened strain on my legs meant I was in about even pain in both sides. Between caning with my right hand, and carrying with my left, both of my shoulders were killing me after about 5 minutes of walking. I also find that when I'm using my cane, I use my core muscles a lot more for balance, and stability, and it causes my ribs to slide in and out almost constantly.
By the time I had the book, I was ready to go home and chop off all my limbs. But I'm stubborn, so I continued on. When I got to the yarn aisle at Wal-Mart I was wishing I'd grabbed the last electric scooter they had for my trip, but I have too much of that self-destructive pride in my blood... By the time I was through Zellers' yarn aisle, I barely felt steady enough to go down the escalator.
This pretty much confirms for me that I will be needing a scooter of my own much sooner than I can emotionally prepare for it. If I can't even walk with a cane while carrying a small book and 3 balls of yarn, I am quite certain I will not be able to push myself in a wheelchair. So that leaves a power chair or a scooter.
The entire trip kept me out for 3 hours, and my concerned hubby texted me asking where I was.
Only good thing is that everywhere I went people were kind enough to open doors for me, and not to stare at me, or comment on my age.
Remembering Michael Lennick
2 weeks ago
4 comments:
I totally get that pride thing. I was the same way before, and even for a while after, I got my wheelchair. It's hard to swallow, but if you're having this much of a hard time, it will in the end make your life a hell of a lot easier. And keep you from doing more damage to your joints. My thoughts are with you!
I hear ya!
I've only used my wheels 4 times and am just sometimes starting to use them in stores and museums etc. It is hard to accept that we need to use these things, it's even harder to swallow our pride and use 'em.
You'll find a way to rock a set of wheels, and do it your way.
Sending juju xx
Thanks for the positive feedback! At 23 years of age, without having a traumatic incident like a car crash, or something, it's really hard to accept that my body could be failing me this much.
My mom and step-dad have been offering to let me take a scooter for the trek to the base of the mountain... You know, the one I DIDN'T climb last year? I figure if I can't make the trek to the base of the mountain, I'm not going to be able to make the climb to the cave, or be able to wander around inside the cave... But one day, I will do it. It might take 3 days instead of one... But I will do it.
Dear Bendy Straw,
Just joking. But seriously, yours is the first EDS blog I've read so far. Glad to hear your humor. I'm coming to grips that I may really have it. I saw the house episode while I was down visiting the Mayo Clinic. Couldn't believe it! And I have had a miscarriage. Just didn't think that was a symptom.
I'm bummed lately in realizing this may be true. then today my husband said something that just hurt so much I didn't know what to make of it. He never says anything cruel. But he said 'he's put up with all my health problems' it hurt more than dislocating. I'm going to read more of the blog. Any words of wisdom I'll take.
ggw
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